I was in bed, in my room at my mom's house. I just woke up from a nap I suppose. The room was dark and for some reason a ceiling fan was set directly above my bed that sits next to the wall. I stood in the middle of my bed to turn on the lights. They burned out. Except one, with a somewhat off rhythm dull pulse. Not completely out; struggling weakly to shine anything at all.
Being on a bed isn't sturdy and I stumbled a bit trying to fix these lights. All of a sudden about five of my girl friends rushed in. "Are you okay?" "We'll help you!" "Let us get it! You alright?!" One of my friends was holding me gently by the arms as if I was in need of a jacket. "I'm fine, really, I'm okay." I said a bit confused and pleased they were so concerned.
Telling this dream to a good friend of mine she responded, "Yay support!" Support indeed! For what? The most striking aspects of this dream were the light bulbs and friends.
Looking up light bulbs I got a description of feeling ineffective, out of ideas and having nothing to offer. This is true. Lately I've been concerned about my current job situation and unsure of what to do. Not knowing where to turn or any steps to take. Also, the worst feeling of having nothing to give of substance. Even if I quit, what then? What do I have?
Seeing my friends meant aspects of my personality that I've rejected but am ready to incorporate and acknowledge. It also means positive news. Checking the date on my phone, I recorded this dream January 1, 2013. 01/01/2013 at 6:23am. That same evening I got the seed planted in my head to seriously consider teacher training this year. This gives me a serious feeling of the Twilight Zone, only with a happy ending.
Oh Universe how subtle you are!
I'll explain. I feel it's significant one light bulb wasn't completely burnt out. It was very faint and barely pulsing but there was light none the less. Though I felt a bit useless and confused I wasn't completely down for the count. A small part of me was saying in a faithful whisper, "No Chelle, there's more. You have something to offer I promise". I've always been a person of many beginnings. I've mentioned this before, trying over and over and over again. Wanting to give up and (thankfully) never being able to.
Aspects of my personality being rejected does not surprise me. I usually have multiple goals to go for and ways of understanding them or aspects to them. I mean really, about five friends for a few light bulbs? I can't be anything but grateful for such support! I do like how I am ready to incorporate and acknowledge them. Even if it takes time to realize that's what I'm doing. They didn't walk or stroll in. My friends, my personality aka true nature and purpose (which I feel at times can be the same thing) rushed in! I was grateful though confused. Positive news. That brings me back to the friend with her hands on my shoulders. As if she was protecting me. My purpose, passions and destiny are here for me. We're friends. Only good can come from that. I'm safe.
I had this dream five days ago and thinking on it now makes this first week in January make sense. Some of the things I signed up just happened to show up to me at the right time, like the both yoga challenges!
- I signed up for a 40 Day Personal Revolution with yoga
- A support group to encourage women to follow their dreams
- A yoga blog challenge to get me over my fear of posting
- Told my family and a few friends about my interest in being a yoga instructor.
All to tremendous support, good vibes and love!
The first day of the year I had a dream about my insecurities. The same dream projected me dashing them away with acknowledging my passions, embracing and following through with them. Five days later, I'm very excited and lovingly supported. It's amazing what your soul knows and how the universe will conspire with it when the need is great.