I noticed something about your last name. I feel it represents a lot about you. Read it slowly.
Did you get it? Here, I'll break it up Past-Il-Off.
The message I get is: Passed Ill Off.
That's one of the main things you talk about. About shaking off the past negativity. The "shoulda, coulda, woulda" as you say. Learning from it and being fine it happened because you are no longer there.
Everyone has flashbacks. Everyone looks back to where they were and spends some time looking around. The point is to not do it too often and to not stay there. Don't live where you don't belong.
You practice living in the moment. Moving forward. And only seem to go to the past to help others, and yourself if needed, with obtaining the greatest present and future! How brave is that? I can't even look at my journal from the past year, heck the past month! Even if it's all good news. You go back Years! You go into the jungle of past unpleasant experiences and cut the negativity of tangled vines with a machete.
Everyone has things in the past that they don't like to remember. We don't like that we wasted time with this, or didn't do that. You on the other hand, and I'm not sure many can, take the past, put in a jar, study it, and then present it in the world as something worth seeing.
You stand as the Ringmaster on stage before the Circus. The Passed Ill Off Circus! We think it's going to be a show of other wonders, (but it's a reflection of the own show we need to put on for ourselves).
Your past is on display. We arrive unaware on how this will effect us and are amazed with glitter a unicorn and twinkling lights. We think it's going to be something we haven't seen before. A new wonder to take us away from where we have been. To stop thinking about it. Instead, your show of the history you lived somehow bleeds into our own.
We weren't expecting this. The crowd is wide eyed and perhaps slack jawed. It's a better surprise and wonder than we ever could have imagined! We didn't realize how much we needed a ticket to this show.
For those surprised and perhaps fearful, and those of us touched and heart swollen, we can hear you calling from the spotlight during a brief intermission.
"Look at this hurt, this experience! Look at his hate and this love! This past me and perhaps a past you as well. Look at what you are manifesting now. This isn't just for me, it's for you too. Don't shy away. Be touched, dazzled, brought to tears or silence. Here is my past. You've got one too!"
The show begins again. The audience sits still as you show us where you have been and where you're going. We are allowed to come along. It's interactive! No expectations, no certain ways things are supposed to be done. Only connection on the highest level and producing the most wonderful-filling manifestations.
Who knew there could be so much good in where we've been? Even the parts that leave a sour taste on the tip of our tongue.
At the end of the show, there's and invitation to come again.
"There it is. It's all there. Nothing to hide and everything to see. Heartbreaks and headaches. Loved ones and sticking to your guns. Holding yourself back and losing your track. New life creating and karaoke yoga gyrating. We are the combination of our past but we don't have to stay there. Passed Ill Off Circus! Whose ready to join me?!"
All I know is, I'll forget about my ticket. I'm running away to join the circus!
~ Chelle aka Writer Yogi